One day a man was reading the classifieds in the newspaper, and he noticed an ad: "For sale. Talking dog. $20.00."
The man noticed that the address was that of his neighbors, so he walks next door. "Hey, Bob. The paper made a mistake on your ad."
"Not a mistake," Bob replies.
"Not a mistake? You mean you actually have a talking dog?"
"Yep. See for yourself. He's in the bedroom."
The man walks into the bedroom, and sees a dog, relaxed on the bed, laying on his back, with his paws behind his head.
"You the talking dog?" the man asks skeptically.
The dog turns and looks at him, and says, "Yep. Good to meet you."
The man is amazed. "Where did you learn to speak English," he asks.
The dog replies, "Well, it started in the Air Force. I used to be a dog instructor at the Air Force's K-9 dog school at Lackland Air Force Base. I learned english pretty good there. Then I was transferred to Army Special Forces. I went on some missions in Latin America, learned some more English, and even picked up some Spanish. After that, I was transferred to the Marines, where I was a Guard Dog at the Embassy in Paris. I learned a little French while I was there. Before I retired, I was transferred to the Navy, where I was a K-9 dog in Italy. Learned me some Italian while I was there."
The man was absolutely amazed. He went back into the living room and said to his neighbor, "That's amazing. How can you sell a dog like that for $20.00?"
The neighbor replied, "Because he's a damn liar. He never did any of those things."
